'here i am'.. 4 months on.

"Here I am, I don't want to forget the things You've planned for me.

The dreams You gave, I'll achieve for You.

You don't have to search for anyone else, I want to go,

Here is my time, here is my hours."

Song by Jesus Adrian Romero.. ' aqui estoy yo'

Thank you for all who have been praying for me..!

Many know that I had a great time in Peru and Colombia, and know what is my suited ministry - working alongside Children's Homes.

Before I say more I want to say a bit about what is happening with me and my project.

When you are on a high, doing a mission trip, you get so close to God. For me I knew that this ministry was where I was called. But now, not able to get involved in the ministry that is suited to you, you can feel down......

God has a plan for you.. and when you are shown it.. you want to get stuck in straight away.....

I prayed about God's plans and purpose for me. He has shown it to me.. now somehow, in some way, I want to move on.

Things I will do:

• Pray- For staying in God's will
• Seek - Seek God for the stages of His plan.
• Find - Find God first in all things.

As I do this blog I nail my colours to the mast.

I don't now what will happen in the coming years. But I know He knows the plans He has for me.

This message was passed on to me.. It really helped me understand things a bit. It is by Paul Washer. (see bottom of page)

He believes the Word (Bible where God's Word is spoken) is true.

Then what impact can it have for kids in a children's home?

The message is for many. And the children's homes where they live day and night most of their lives is a great place to get alongside them, showing them Gods love, to walk with them on this discovery and to disciple them! Not that they get to be just a cultural Christian but to look at the Word of God, and see that that they can be changed. (This thought is expanded at the end of the message.. )

I think I would like many people to see that they can get in to these special places of children's homes as a real opportunity to reach and mentor new Christians in their hard, difficult lives to go onward with Christ. Let us not dash in and out of kids' lives but let us be an example like Christ that we are there for them all the time..

Please pray as I go on this journey, either to set up or work alongside a Children's home..

Yours again in Christ,

J-D

This is the message by Paul Washer. (below) sorry i have now update this to the sermon.

“Good, thanks!”

I’m back now 2 months from my trip in Peru and Colombia. I have found good support and encouragement about the children’s home project in Arequipa. Thank you for your interest. For some it’s still not clear what they are supporting....and in reality sometimes I don’t even know myself!

I have said that this blog will continue till I reach one of three options:

· Set up a children’s home myself.

· Or, join an existing home and take things from there.

· Or plan ‘C’......What ever that is?

In this post I want to inform you where this project is at, in the context of a few thoughts on “Good, thanks”.

Life is often presented as doing well at studies, getting a job and being happy, so that when people ask, “How’s life?” you just reply, “Good, thanks!”

However, what have I been doing? I have been to many small courses, from suicide prevention to youth ministry weekends where there’s seminar after seminar about youth and our role in their lives; I have had many conversations about the whole vision of a children’s home; I have asked questions to directors; I have been finding out everything about charities and children’s homes; I have drawn up a list of books to read........

Why am I not just thinking about “getting on with what my life has dealt me with so as to be able to say, Good, thanks”? Rather than thinking of where I’m going or what I’m doing.

Post-Modern culture has brought us up to think , “what ever”,, and , “have it our own way”.. we have an “if it feels good, go with it” attitude and in all this we are,, “good thanks” The world goes by and often we don’t stop to understand what it’s all about! We don’t take time to think what’s going on, why we do what we do, or whom we do it for....unless, one day, we find things are “not that that good”!

My thing is, don’t just “get on with living” - take a step back and think what it’s for. Whatever we do in the future will be determined by the stand point we take now.

· Think about what the Trinity is about and how this will impact how we live our lives.

· Think about the cross (Forgiveness of sins, Christos Victor, Reconciliation, Redemption) and how this will impact how we live our lives.

· Think about God Incarnate (God took on flesh) and how this impacts how we live.

· Think about a call to mission and how this impacts what we do with our lives.

· Think about empowerment by the Holy Sprit, the tasks of Word, prayer and spiritual direction. And how our lives could be with this?

· Think about our role in the Church and how this impacts our lives.

The relationship we have with these truths will guide our interaction with what we do. Let’s not just coast and keep saying, “Good, thanks”.

So this is what I’m doing at the moment...trying to:

Don Browning “action-reflection model”.

- Understand (what’s going on?),

- Reflect: (what am I doing?)

- Detect and Evaluate: ( putting down commitments in my life)

- Project: ( Strategies, on how I can live my life for GOD)

-

HOW CAN YOU BEST SUPPORT ME?

- Please pray: for the vision to set up a children’s home. May it be a God-inspired venture. Pray for God’s leading - I don’t have the answers and need to be lead forward.

- If you know of people who have gone thought setting up a charity, I would love to talk to them about what they think.

- Also if you know of any children’s home around the world, I would like to contact them.

- If you know a good book about youth or children at risk, even parenting, leadership books.. Subjects that can help me think about this project more and get more understanding.

- If you know any courses out there that are relevant to this work let me know.

- I want to start getting a list of people who will dedicate themselves to pray for this with me. So please if you want to be part of this, it would be an encouragement if you would let me know - even write your name on the comment box at the bottom. THANKS!

"who,what and then why"

This week I have been thinking very intensely about the concept of ‘a calling’ - something which God has set upon one’s heart in which to follow Him specifically.

Naturally as a human I have been asking myself many questions about this. I am constantly thinking about the future and how big and daunting it is. The danger is that it can be without God..

And that’s where you ask yourself again and again the fundamental questions that brought you to this point, to check that you are living for the right thing and not just a dream land or wayward feelings.

I have found some very good comments from the website of a children’s home which I will quote from below. (If you want to read more about what they say, please have a look as it really explains much more!)

After finding out ‘Who’ you are you may ask yourself ‘What’ you do or what you want to do. In my case I want to set up a children’s home. The next questions many be ‘Why we do it? Or, ‘Why would you really want to do it?’

I am speaking of course as a Christian to other Christians who understand ‘who they are’ and maybe know ‘what they want to do’. But we need also to think ‘Why?’ The answer to this question may help us in the approach of ‘How?’

I can’t fully write down all the strands of thoughts that will help you or me… but I will add what has helped me. And for the readers of this blog, please make it a prayer point for this stage in my life.

Many thanks J-D

This extract is from http://www.armsoflove.org/why_compassion.htm

Why We Do It: Compassion

In his recent book, "Where Soldiers Fear to Tread," journalist John Burnett writes about his time working as a relief worker for the United Nations in Somalia. John occasionally ruminates on the broader purpose of his mission, and the various reasons that the people he's working with are risking their lives to engage in the relief effort. He comes up with various reasons ... salary, egos, adventure, all kinds of personal issues, but rarely, in his opinion, compassion. John writes,

"If there are any heroes in this world, we are not among them. Who of us is in it for altruism? ... We each have our reasons. But I don't think compassion is what drives most relief workers. ... In the eyes of the mainstream, I suspect we all could be considered a bit mad, loonies pursuing some mythic quest. We have become too antsy and too deterred for a life of spiritless routine, too selfish for much compassion, and too human for heroism. All this for a lousy paycheck."

Now listen to the final paragraph of John's book:

"Day after day, it just goes on and on, one miserable event after another. As David said, God favors no one, not those who perish, not those who serve. The misery of the world will continue with or without our gallant efforts. Let others replace me; let others try to save the damn world."

John's autobiographical story is a compelling one, and these final words bring into sharp focus the ultimate question: Does any of our work really make a difference?

"Has anyone's life really made a difference?"

We read in Matt. 15:32: Jesus said to his disciples, "I feel compassion for the people, because they have remained with me now three days and have nothing to eat, and I do not want to send them away hungry."

And so with seven loaves and a few fish, Jesus fed the four thousand. Compassion was the motivating factor behind Jesus feeding the hungry.

"Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this: to care for orphans and widows in their distress …" James 1:27.

What is compassion? Compassion is not merely thinking, "I have an obligation to help that person." Compassion is a deep feeling that is aroused when we see someone crying, hungry, sick, or hurting, and it stirs us to act on that person's behalf. The distinction is critical.

The post on http://www.armsoflove.org/why_compassion.htm goes on to finish with this statement:

Sometimes we see so many needs around us, so much desperation in this world, that we become overwhelmed and desensitized, and our hearts become calloused. Whenever our hearts stop breaking when we see someone in need, we need to take our hearts before God and ask Him to break our hearts afresh and fill our hearts with His compassion. This is the starting point for carrying out Jesus' ministry. And it is the wellspring of hope and perseverance in the face of overwhelming need.

The ministry of Jesus requires a broken heart.

(Please read the other extract from http://www.armsoflove.org/why_justice.htm)

Why We Do It: Justice

This section concludes:.

By ministering to all of the needs of each and every child, our goal is to bring healing into every part of their lives. Our vision for them -- God's heart for them -is that the children will be made whole … and that God's justice will be manifested and accomplished in their lives and in the lives of future generations.

(Please read the 3ed extract from http://www.armsoflove.org/why_mercy.htm)

Why We Do It: Mercy

This section concludes:,

Jesus' last words to us were to "Go, and make disciples of all nations." Go, and bring the good news of the gospel to the poor! Go, and show my compassion to the lost! Go, and execute justice on behalf of the oppressed! Go, and show my mercy to those who have been thrown away! Go, and feed the hungry in my name! Go, and bring my glory to the nations!

So why do we spend so much of our lives just staying right where we're at? "Blooming where we're planted." We are not potted plants. God gave us hands, He gave us feet, and He told us to "Go!"

There's a prevalent notion that we're just called to be good Christians wherever we are at - at home, at work, at the grocery store. But what part of that philosophy involves going anywhere? If that is all we ever did, there are many people in our own community who would never hear the good news of Jesus and who would never have the gospel demonstrated to them - much less those in other parts of the world.

We have to find ways to go beyond our daily routine, to get outside our comfort zone, to connect with people outside our every day sphere of relationships, and minister to their needs in Jesus name. Moved by His compassion. Doing justice in His name. Showing His mercy. That's what it means to GO.

(All extracts were copied from www.armsoflove.org)

Back in Belfast – one month on.

I arrived back on the first of August. It has been great to see folks again and see where they'er at. I like the summer time here as you can get out and about more as more poeple have free time. Climbing Sleive Donnard was good experience to bring it home to me that i as actually in Northern Ireland again.

The summer time also brings many Christian conferences and guest speakers. I have been attending to the Bangor Worldwide Mission Convention, and before that, listening to K.P Yohannan, the founder of Gospel for Asia (GFA). Before hearing the speakers my concentration was a bit all over the place as during my stay of six months in children’s homes life was full of the busyness that I love to get involved with.

At present my thoughts are gripped with the fact that I now have to start putting my vision in action. I have come back having eaten into my

student loan, with no job, and not wanting to return to my architecture degree which I dropped a year ago. My mind is swirling around the fact of not knowing really the best move to take next. Right now I know that some sort of job is in order, so I have signed on jobseekers till something turns up. I know with so many people on the job hunt it could be a long hunt for me too.

I have enrolled in some small courses about youth ministry and also gone back into volunteering as a mentor. I went yesterday to a College open day. Afterwards, talking to my friend in the rain under a tree, I thought how does someone that is really nobody get to have a vision for setting up a children’s home (and as my vision goes, it’s a big one – a home plus many other things that work alongside it also). Later that day I heard that a 29 year old builder from here has been setting up a children’s home during the last few years in Africa, and is now setting up a school. Then I hear of a 22 year old girl from England who visited Bolivia and has not returned as she is at the start of setting up a children’s home too.

In the Bangor Convention I sat listening to mission

representatives and missionaries reporting on the work in many countries. They spoke of a God that really works in many ways and that we cannot have an excuse to say that God does not do his work.

I also talked to others at stalls about children’s homes and had very encouraging conversations. you see the idea, It’s not just a social work idea but to bring many to know God and get alongside them discipling and reaching others.

So in all I sum up:

In a hundred years from now, what will the things of this life be worth? Really my wish would be is that if I could set up a Home back in Arequipa city where I was adopted, that many of the kids that I took in would stand by my side in heaven. Then it would be worth it! I also desire that the home and all the other ministries would keep on going. Then what a joy it will be to come across people in heaven who say:

“I was in Arequipa as a child and was taken in to the children’s home”, or “I saw the good works you did and understood that it was because God loved me first that Christian do this. And I am here

because someone said that they would follow God and do what he was calling him to do.”

Please pray that the vision may be accomplished:

· That I may take the risk of living for God, and not to play my life safe.

· That I may seek God’s will in every day as

every day counts to reach his will.

· For the things like courses that will equip

me in my thinking for this ministry.

· For employment to keep me afloat financially

· For the idea of setting up a charity and what that all entails.

· For wisdom in all things

Thank you for your on going prayers. An army of prayer can do so much more than you realise.

My Last 2 Weeks at Children’s Vision, Bogota...

The second week I was in the home, the team from my home church, Strandtown / Holywood Baptist, arrived. It was really great to have them there! Peter Lockhart who had been with me in Peru at the very start of this trip was among them. To see him again was really nice as he

could understand more about what I was getting up to.

I have seen many teams visit children’s homes. Last year I was there myself a s a member of the S/H team. But towelcome this team and to see their work and love towards the children made me realise that, yes, God does dowonderful things using his people - for two weeks of their lives, the kids had very friendly, loving friends from Northern Ireland. Most of the team were already sponsors and God-parents of the children.

As my role was being a mentor for the rest of my time here,

I worked behind the scenes with the kids every day. Which I thoroughly enjoyed! As an ordinary tea

m member you only see some aspects of the work. At the beginning I just made friends with the children before becoming a mentor.

So I got really close as friends to the boys in the home. In some way I was picking up what it means to live in a home from their point of view. I understood their issues and in some way looked out on the team and the workers from where they stood.

I know that this is quite something to say, but they opened up to me as a big bother or friend or even as a daddy. I saw their biggest need - they need love. Some one that is a tutor who deals equally with all the kids of the group and comes in because it’s their job is different. But as I worked there

as a volunteer with my full conviction to devote my attention and efforts for them I saw

that this meant so much. Then the team came and when they shared their love and friendship you could see that the kids really were very happy because they knew it was real.

I became a God-parent of Miguel. Through him, God showed me what He can do when He fills a little heart with the love of God. How powerful it is and how attractive it is! Miguel in many ways did want me as his Father-figure and him to be as my child. But talking to him, I realised that the One who came first in his life was God... He often would say to me, “God comes first, then me!”.. As I know that with all his heart he meant those words, I know that this child will grow up to be a strong follower of the Lord.

As we prayed and even sang songs before he went to sleep, we gave thanks to God for his work in all the children’s homes. We gave thanks that He has not forgotten about us. I reminded Miguel that I was adopted but God did not forget about me, He picked me up and gave me hope for this life. He gave me the opportunity to know Him and to follow Him.

I mentioned to Miguel that God had put it in my heart to reach many more boys and girls for God so they too can fully be in relationship with Him, to be an instrument in bringing God’s love to them, in setting up a children’s home in Peru where I was adopted.

Miguel knew that His God definitely can fulfil His purposes, and we gave thanks together for God’s leading in our lives.

So having finished this 6 month tour

of visiting and helping in many children’s homes, I want to close this post with the words I left the boys on the farewell evening at the end of July.

“I did not choose my name

I did not choose where I live

I did not even choose my parent.

But then I grew up

And got to choose a new name

A new place to live

A new parent

My new name is Christian

My new place to live is Heaven

And my new parent is my Abba Father”

Colombia post (4 weeks over due!)

Job 10:9
Remember that you moulded me like clay. Will you now turn me to dust again?

SORRY, This post is 4

weeks over due..

Now I am back in Belfast, I am thinking back over my experience and remembering the lessons I learnt. I value the insights so much as I still have on my heart to open a new home for children in Peru, in Arequipa, the city where I was born..

This post is about the time before the Standtown Baptist team came from Northern Ireland.

When I arrived in Children's Vision Internationakl, Bogota, the kids were on a 3 week break from school so not all were at the home - they were with God-parents and mum’s and/or dad’s..

Most days we went on planned activities with the 20 or so that remained. Downtown was nice as I had not really seen the centre of the city.. we went to art galleries and parks and generally out and about.. the boys and girls all enjoyed this very much and I enjoyed it too..

My role was to be a helper with the other mentors that look after the kids. Then when school started I was to get on the rota and be a proper mentor.. I was looking forward to this as I knew I would learn a lot. I have met most of the kids before and so really got alongside them very easily. I remember the boys asking me last time I was there when I would be back and I said next year.. so it was nice to have fulfilled that.

“Mould me” this is what we say to God as we call on him to work in our lives.. I said it many times each day that I was there and now I say to him too: lead and guide.. mould me..! You know.. God did just that .. As the weeks passed in Colombia I called out more and more to God as I knew that this life of mine is not mine but God's and therefore I wanted to go and do what He wanted for me and give me guidance for the next step back in Northern Ireland..

As I looked up I prayed for God to show me the future I realised that it really would be to help kids like these, but in Peru not Colombia. So the future was getting clearer, but I know God has to work lots on me before all this.. Dismantle me to build me up in his way so that I can be more effective for Him and that He can use me in his way..

I believe as I went through the next week He showed more of his love and the need of my life to be fully dependent on Him..

2 Corinthians 4:6-8 (New International Version)

⁶For God, who said, "Let light shine out of darkness,"^]made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ.

⁷But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. ⁸We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair;